450+ Corny Jokes and Puns (2025)

Laughter is the best medicine, and sometimes the cheesiest, corniest jokes bring the biggest smiles. Corny jokes are simple, pun-filled, and perfect for lightening the mood anywhere. Whether you’re looking for funny one-liners, dad jokes, or groan-worthy puns, this collection of over 450 corny jokes will keep you entertained for hours. These jokes are great for family gatherings, parties, or just sharing with friends to spark joy. Corny humor thrives on wordplay, unexpected twists, and innocent silliness, making it an evergreen source of amusement. This article is designed to be a comprehensive resource for those who love clean, humorous content that everyone can enjoy.

Explore jokes ranging from classic puns to witty one-liners that are easy to remember and share. Dive into these jokes that highlight the charm of corny humor and discover your next favorite joke to brighten the day. Get ready to laugh, chuckle, and maybe even roll your eyes at the delightful corniness packed in this collection.

Classic Corny Jokes

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

Dad Jokes for Everyday Smiles

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
I used to hate facial hair… but then it grew on me.
Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

Animal-Themed Corny Jokes

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
How do bees get to school? By school buzz.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite.
Why did the cow go to space? To see the moooon.
What do you call an alligator detective? An investi-gator.
How does a dog stop a video? By pressing the paws button.
What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
Why did the elephant bring a suitcase? Because it was packing its trunk.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.

Food Corny Jokes

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because it felt crummy.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi!
Why don’t melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.
What do you call cheese that’s sad? Blue cheese.
What did one plate say to the other? Tonight, dinner’s on me.
Why did the tomato sit down? It couldn’t ketchup.
How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall.

School and Learning Jokes

Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
What do you get when you cross a teacher with a vampire? Lots of blood tests.
Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
What is a snake’s favorite subject? Hiss-tory.
Why did the music teacher go to jail? Because she got caught with too many sharp objects.
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
Why was the geometry book unhappy? Because it had too many angles.
What do you call a nervous javelin thrower? Shakespeare.
What’s a pirate’s favorite subject? Arrrrrrt.
Why did the computer go to school? To improve its byte.

Technology Corny Jokes

Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
Why did the smartphone need glasses? It lost its contacts.
How do robots pay for things? With cache.
Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? Because it lost its contacts.
Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.
What do you call an iPhone that isn’t kidding? Dead Siri-ous.
How did the computer get out of a tricky situation? Ctrl + Alt + Del.
Why did the computer show up at work late? It had a hard drive.
What do you call a computer superhero? A Screen Saver.
Why do computers hate the outdoors? Too many bugs.

Seasonal Corny Jokes

Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Frosted flakes.
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
Why did the Easter egg hide? Because it was a little chicken.
What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite.
Why was the turkey at the baseball game? Because he was the foul ball.
What’s Santa’s favorite type of music? Wrap.
Why do ghosts go to parties? Because they have a blast.
What do you call a cat on the beach during Christmas? Sandy Claws.
Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber? It needed to trim its tinsel.

Sports Corny Jokes

Why did the baseball team hire a detective? To catch their fly balls.
What is a golfer’s favorite letter? Tee.
Why was the basketball court wet? Because the players dribbled all over it.
What’s a football player’s favorite drink? A touchdown shake.
Why did the tennis player bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.
How do baseball players stay cool? They sit next to the fans.
What do you call a pig who plays basketball? A ball hog.
Why did the soccer player bring string? To tie the score.
Why was the soccer stadium so hot? Because all the fans left.
What’s a runner’s favorite type of candy? Track mix.

Relationship Corny Jokes

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the two lovers end up in prison? Because they stole each other’s hearts.
I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
Why did the skeleton break up with his girlfriend? Because she didn’t have the guts.
What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.
My girlfriend told me I’m terrible at directions. So I packed up and right.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, even relationships.
What do you call a broken heart? A love wreck.
Why do relationships like math? Because you add a lot, subtract a lot, and multiply your problems.
I told my wife she was overreacting. She said, “I’m not! I’m just animated.”

Work and Office Corny Jokes

Why did the employee bring a ladder to work? Because they were climbing the corporate ladder.
What do you call a calendar’s favorite day? Date night.
Why don’t some people trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
What do you call a nervous javelin thrower? Shakespeare.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.
How do you organize a party at work? You plan it.
Why was the computer tired when it got to work? It had too many tabs open.
What did the receptionist say to the calendar? Your days are numbered.
Why did the printer break up with the paper? Too many jams.

Clean Corny Jokes for Kids

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because it was stuffed.
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
Why did the banana go out with the prune? Because it couldn’t find a date.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

Movie and TV Show Corny Jokes

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything — including movie plots.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta — perfect for Italian films.
Why did the movie theater hire a detective? To catch the reel criminals.
Why did the vampire go to the comedy show? For a good fang-tastic laugh.
What’s a pirate’s favorite TV show? The “Arrrrrrr-cher.”
Why did the superhero flush the toilet? Because it was his duty.
What’s a Jedi’s favorite dessert? Obi-Wan Cannoli.
Why did the scarecrow star in a movie? Because he was outstanding in his field.
What do you call a movie about a broken pencil? Pointless.
Why did the comedian go to jail? For stealing the show.

Travel and Vacation Corny Jokes

Why did the airplane get sent to its room? It had a bad altitude.
Why don’t mountains get cold in the winter? Because they wear snowcaps.
What do you call a suitcase full of money? A travel fund.
Why did the beach break up with the ocean? It felt washed up.
Why don’t secrets last on a boat? Because they always leak.
How do you organize a party on the moon? You planet.
Why did the tourist bring a ladder? To reach new heights.
What do you call a nervous traveler? A plane wreck.
Why did the hotel hire the pianist? For the keys to success.
What’s a pirate’s favorite vacation spot? The Caribbean.

Music and Instrument Corny Jokes

Why did the piano break up with the accordion? Because it found it too much of a squeeze.
What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did the guitar teacher go to jail? For fingering a minor.
What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.
Why did the music note get arrested? Because it was sharp.
What’s a drummer’s favorite snack? A cymbal bar.
Why was the singer arrested? She got caught singing in the wrong key.
What’s a musician’s favorite type of cheese? String cheese.
How do you fix a broken tuba? With a tuba glue.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.

Science Corny Jokes

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
What did one DNA strand say to the other? Do these genes make me look fat?
Why was the physics book sad? Because it had so many problems.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.
How do you know the moon is going broke? It’s down to its last quarter.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.
Why did the germ go to the party? Because it was contagious.
How do chemists freshen their breath? With experi-mints.
Why are chemists excellent problem solvers? They have all the solutions.

Animal Puns for Every Occasion

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
Why did the crab never share? Because it was shellfish.
What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A python.
How do cows stay up to date? They read the moos-paper.
Why don’t ants get sick? Because they have tiny ant-bodies.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What did the duck say when she bought lipstick? Put it on my bill.
Why was the cat sitting on the computer? To keep an eye on the mouse.
What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede? A walkie-talkie.

Holiday Corny Jokes

What do you get if you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite.
Why was the Christmas tree bad at knitting? It kept dropping its needles.
What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving? Lucky.
Why did Santa’s helper see the doctor? Because he had low “elf” esteem.
What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper.
Why don’t vampires like Thanksgiving? Because of the stakes.
What do ghosts serve for dessert? I scream.
How do you scare a snowman? You get a hairdryer.
Why did the Easter egg hide? Because it was a little chicken.
What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny.

Light Bulb Jokes

How many corny joke lovers does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it’ll take 450 jokes to brighten the room.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that’s a hardware problem.
How many ticklers does it take to change a light bulb? Ten ticklers, one to change it and nine to make you laugh.
How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but they have to get into character first.
How many comedians does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but the joke takes forever.
How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb? Two: one to screw it in and one to give it a twist.
How many tennis players does it take to change a light bulb? Love means nothing to them.
How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they prefer to play in the dark.
How many bakers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they knead the dough in the dark.
How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just redefine darkness as the new standard.